Friday, March 23, 2007


I have JUST discovered the wonders of The Indigo Girls. I know, I know, where have I been, right? Well, I'll tell you where I've been, BUSY, that's where I've been! I've been busy in Busyville. Busy as a little busy bee. Anyhoo, I'm coming back from Busyville to the Land of the Living. We parents of children with special needs tend to stay in Busyville for a ridiculous amount of time. You can't believe what's involved in raising these kids. You're lucky to get out alive.

So, as I was saying, I've just discovered The Indigo Girls, and as I am prone to do, I'm listening to them non-stop. I'm all over the song, "Least Complicated." "The hardest to learn was the least complicated," the song says. Amen to that.

These special children can make the simple complicated, and the complicated simple. You find yourself raising one of these kids and you are challenged in all ways imaginable. Everything you thought was important, you're forced to reconsider. Everything you thought you wanted out of life - questioned. Everything you used to hang your hat on - poof - gone. I've talked before how this is a grief process - there is so much loss.

Like with all loss, you eventually re-build. Stronger, steadier, tougher and with any luck, funnier and with far more compassion. You find new friends along the re-building process. They mirror back to you what you're projecting. You begin to know again what's important. You start to have clear ideas of what you want. Your hat finds a new place to hang.

The view from Land of the Living is a lot brighter than you might imagine. The grief process sharpens the senses. Eyes see beauty. Ears hear truth. Mouths speak kindness. Minds seek wisdom. Hearts open to love.

13 comments:

Jess said...

You discovered the Indigo Girls! Very sweet. Of course, they have been around longer than you've had kids, but we'll let that go this time.

Check out the song "Closer to Fine." I think you'll like it. ;)

Love.

Suzy said...

Interesting as I read this piece, this seems to be what you do for people. You Miss Carrie, tend to everyone's special needs. For that I, along with others are so very blessed, but hopefully us friends won't forget about your "needs."

Love you!

Kim said...

What a moving and inspiring post. That last paragraph is AMAZING!

To me, you are a phoenix, bursting into this new life strong and brilliant and beaming your brightness for a million miles around.

And those wonderfully special children are as lucky to have you as you are to have them!

Terry Whitaker said...

This is your prologue. This is so incredibly YOU. This defines your "specialness" so succinctly and so beautifully.

Prema said...

Indigo Girls - they last a long time. They can carry you across a decade. You might be listening to them on your ipod in the green room, waiting to see Oprah! Better yet, you'll be in partnership with them for the Feather Fund! Visioning big for you, Carrie. All of the training has been for this...this time. Your time.

kario said...

Carrie, Carrie, Carrie (shakes her head) - just discovered them, huh? You've got a lot of catching up to do ;-).

Glad you like "Least Complicated" - listen to "Watershed" sometime. I think it will speak to you.

jennifer said...

Lovely writing, Link!!!

You are the Link that holds it all together.

Nancy said...

You are amazing!

Michelle O'Neil said...

Special needs kids teach us it's okay to do things "in our own time." Like discovering the Indigo Girls.

Enjoy!


: )

grammer said...

"Eyes see beauty. Ears hear truth. Mouths speak kindness. Minds seek wisdom. Hearts open to love."

It could be this easy.
A prayer for the world!

Thank you, Carrie. You go right to the core. xo t

Monica said...

I'm trying to imagine your day, Carrie. I'm trying to imagine everything that must go into caring for both of your amazing children. I'm in complete awe. And I see the light in you - there's not a person on earth who could miss it. You are filled to the brim with hope and compassion.

holly said...

You are amazing, even if you're a little behind on coming to these tunes. But music, like everything else, comes to us when we are most poised to hear it!

LOVE!

Jess said...

Hmm, yeah maybe we should get them for our benefit concert, eh? ;)