Carrie Link

ACCIDENTS, COINCIDENCES AND OTHER BULLSHIT

My God the world is small. Daily I find a link between two seemingly unrelated people or events. It's weird, kind of freaky, or super cool and exciting. You decide.

I remember being so confounded as a child hearing that God speaks to us, if only we listen. I listened! NOTHING! He was not telling me a damn thing! I couldn't get The Big Guy to give me the time of day!

Now I'm so bombarded with messages I need earplugs.

Enough is as good as a feast already! A little silence please! A break from the unrelenting messages from the Universe? Would it kill ya?

I spent a lot of years "praying" to God. My prayers looked and sounded a helluva lot like wishes. Actually, they were a perverse manifestation of my OCD. The prayers were based in superstition and fear. If I didn't pray, then the bad things the prayers were warding off, would come barreling out and knock me over, probably kill me. A risk I was not willing to take. Certainly the energy I was expending keeping the demons away, left little for the good to come in.

One day I'd had enough. Had it up to here with all that behavior and fear. I was exhausted. I needed a break. Come what may, I was going cold turkey on the vigilant praying. I couldn't keep it up. Period.

Nothing bad happened. Not the first minute, hour or day. I decided to keep stepping over the line of fear I'd drawn in the sand, and walk towards the trust I knew had to be there somewhere. God told us to trust too, didn't He? "God is love," the banner in the hallway said. What I was feeling every day of my life was not love, it was something bad, and bad just wasn't working anymore. Had nothing to lose. Already feeling bad, why not try something else? Maybe feel better? Just a little?

It worked. It works. Don't beleive me, though. It isn't important what I believe, it's important what you believe. Find your own truth, your own way, whatever path leads you to peace and love. Period.