Wednesday, May 19, 2010

WHY AM I HERE?


Had to spend a whole day at home earlier this week. STM was expecting an important package to be delivered, and it required a signature. I looked at my calendar and I didn't have any appointments, no errands that just had to be run that day, so I said I could do it. After all, I don't "work."

Cannot tell you how many times I had the urge to jet off somewhere, to take care of some annoying thing on my list, to go out into the backyard (where I would not be able to hear the doorbell) to pull weeds that had not made my radar until that very moment. On and on it went. The more aware I was that I couldn't go anywhere, the more I felt the need to.

Kept having to ask myself, "Why am I here? Oh, yea, to receive the package from UPS."

Asking myself "Why am I here?" all day?

Not a bad way to spend the day when you think about it.

12 comments:

fullsoulahead.com said...

You are here for much more than STM's package.

; )

Deb Shucka said...

I love this. A day to just be here and to wonder why you are here. A whole new kind of work.

Courtney said...

Don't let anyone ever tell you that you don't work!!!!

One Mom said...

These days sure can be hard to get through while they're happening, but for me they always seem to be the best in retrospect.

Sometimes I think I just need someone or something to force me to slow down when things get too crazy. It's the days that immediately follow these when I notice the little things that had failed to appear on my radar before...and life seems so much better then. ;)

Brenda said...

I'm ALWAYS walking to different rooms in my house, pausing, and saying, "Wait, why am I here?" And have to backtrack to remember why. Sigh.

therocchronicles said...

I've had this same kind of day--waiting and waiting and it leading to wondering.

pixiemama said...

A great question, but I'm totally doubled over at MO'N's comment.

Wanda said...

So did the package arrive?

Elizabeth said...

Carrie, only you can turn something so simple and mundane as "waiting" into such a beautiful post. Thank you.

Tabitha Bird said...

Yes, us mother's don't do any 'work' do we :)

I think after I accept the fact that I am not going anywhere those kind of days are not too bad. But I usually fight with myself all day to just relax and enjoy being home. Hmmm... :)

Tanya @ TeenAutism said...

I have been asking myself that question for quite some time!

kario said...

I hope it was a dang good package!

It is funny how hard it is to do something we know we "have" to do. I could feel your anxiety at suddenly finding reasons to get out of the house when you knew you were supposed to stay. I'd be the same way.

Love you.